Psalm 86:12 (NKJV)
“I will praise You, O Lord my God, with all my heart, And I will glorify Your name forevermore.”
What is the number one item on your prayer list to God? How about the top two? I have my top two and have had them for some time. Full confession? Lately I’ve noticed a pause in my spirit when praying. Oh, I acknowledge that God is God and there is no one or no thing like Him. I say He is my Lord and I want to obey Him in all things. I say He is always good and then those two requests jump to the front of the line. It’s as if I have a check that says, “You are good but if you are, then what about these requests?” So my hands of praise turn to hands filled with questions.
Honesty is never a bad thing because it is what it is, and when we’re honest about who we are we can do something about it. God is God and He can handle my lack of understanding as to how He works and what He does in my life. My top two prayers are, I believe, in perfect alignment with His overall will for His children, but who says that is His specific will for me? He gets to say. So as I lift my hands to Him and ask Him to fill them with those two things, His answer should have zero bearing on my attitude or response to Him. He is God. He has already proven His love for me (John 3:16). He has forgiven me (Psalm 103:3, I John 1:9), redeemed me (Psalm 103:4, Galatians 4:4-5), and has plans for me (Prov 19:21). My hesitancy in prayer is a sign that there is work to be done in me.
So I pause, recognize the hesitation, and walk through what I know. I agree with what scripture and the Holy Spirit confirms to me and I resist the part of me that would question God’s love, goodness, ability or purpose. I submit to God’s specific plan for me.
What are your top two? Has God shown Himself faithful to you in other things? If we’re honest, if He answered those top two with a yes – wouldn’t we automatically populate those slots with our next top two? I am more convinced today than ever before that God can use our unanswered prayers just as much as our answered prayers. For, if we’re following Him, those things we want the most must always be filtered through His will and His purposes. If we’re following Him, we must stay in continuous relationship and sometimes our needs bring us to His throne faster than our praise.
The submission to His will for us in difficult places reminds me of Daniel. God’s purposes were met in Daniel’s life despite him being a slave. The questioning of God’s goodness or love reminds me of the devil in the garden saying “did God say” (Gen 3:1). The response of our hearts to trust Him anyway, not because of some strength in our character, but with the help of the Holy Spirit and as an act of our will, may be the very reason we are where we are. Perhaps it is to shut the mouth of the accuser who says we will curse God if He removes His protection or His graciousness (Job 1:11). Perhaps it is to strengthen our faith muscles (Jer 12:5). It may be to teach us to glorify God with all we are irrespective of how things turn out in this life (Job 13:15a). In hard times it may be to grow us in such a way that, irrespective of our prayer list, our whole heart can truly praise and glorify God. This is my goal. I hope it is yours. To live to honor God, believing Him for the best while humbly submitting to His plan. That in the difficulties of my humanness, I might live as God designs, love as God intends and praise God with all my heart, with no hesitation and no reservation.
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